Boundaries for a lot of us, is a scary concept.
We think by drawing boundaries we might offend others, not be liked by others, lose your invitation to the next gathering and the list goes on.
Nobody wants to stop receiving love and validation, nor wishes to experience a sense of abandonment - but at what cost?
If you have to make yourself small and quiet for someone to accept you, is that sense of being liked worth it? When you say yes to a project knowing that you’re overwhelmed, is being validated from your lead worth it? Being that ‘good child’ who takes care of everyone in the family by neglecting your needs worth it?
The answer is that it isn’t. And the hard truth is that no one can protect you unless you protect your own boundaries, and not many people will understand your boundaries. But remember you are worthy and we (ourselves) needs to honour and protect our own line that shouldn’t be crossed.
If you don’t know where to begin, here are some tips for you to try!
- Listen to your gut feeling - your gut is your second brain. If you feel something (discomfort, pain etc) it’s a hard ‘no.’
- Not feeling that sense of inner peace? It’s a sign. Taking the courage to protect your boundaries will result in peace. If not, you will have constant thoughts running in your mind.
- Compassion. Compassion for when you’ve let others cross your boundaries. Compassion for when others didn’t understand you by drawing a line. Compassion for trying.
Nothing hurts us more than abandoning our own self. Our needs matter, and our boundaries therefore, matters. Please remember that you’re worthy of your own self protection and a lot of compassion.